Friday, August 28, 2009

Women Need Women

I'm writing this on August 12th which would have been my Aunt Grace's 87th birthday and yesterday would have been my mom's 79th birthday - both died a few years ago.
Do you ever stop missing your mom after she's gone? I don't think so...

I guess I'm feeling nostalgic and melancholy (not always a good combination), but I thought about how we need godly women in our lives. There are some things only women get (how you can talk for 30 minutes and when asked what you talked about you say, "nothing," and it's really true - you just talked about nothing big, just stuff...)

In the olden days (as my kids used to call it), women used to get together at quilting bees (thank God, we don't do that now as I tried it once and was terrible at it), canned food for the winter together, birthed each other's babies, etc. They were a support system for each other. In our culture (and especially if you are a church planter's wife) women leave their families and move 500 miles away. Who is there when you need a listening ear, a cup of coffee, or help?

Even though my husband is my best friend and I love sharing with him, sometimes I can see his eyes glaze over as I describe the last sale I he tries to endure to the end. (Someone said the theme song for women is "Feelings" and the one for men is "Just the Facts, Ma'am.") Men also tend to want to "fix" the situation. (We have a "code" for needing sympathy - Just "poor baby" me, I ask.) I actually think I'm a better wife IF I have women friends. I don't overburden him with every little thing.

I know you may be thinking that adding another thing (finding and/or spending time with a friend) to your crammed schedule is something you can leave off. But spending time with a friend can renew, encourage, comfort, and help you make it through the "stuff" you're facing. Being married to a church planter makes it even harder - they are often like the old-time cowboys - pioneering works and moving from place to place. That makes it hard to put down roots and make lasting friendships. Make the effort to find at least one friend - it's worth it! Stay connected (it's way easier now than it was in the olden days)!


  1. Great post - brought back fond memories AND I agree with you that women need women

  2. I liked this post a lot :) SO true! And, I love the new "look" of your blog...very girly and fun!

  3. Well, I just read through my Together with God...saw your article and your blog site. I was excited to see that you have one! Will keep checking back! Brooke