Tuesday, October 26, 2010

What's Really Important


I was just in South Carolina visiting our daughter and I was reminded of how God is always shaping us. Rachel (who I hadn't seen since August when she moved there to work on the campus of USC Spartanburg with Campus Crusade) and I had a delightful time together - eating, laughing, shopping (at the Goodwill, of course) and just being together.

The three short days flew by and it was the last morning I was there. I made her a chocolate and toast breakfast (a sweet - literally- family tradition) and we went back to her room. I was intent on finishing up the curtains. We had bought ribbon for tiebacks, but had to screw in the cup hooks and cut the ribbon to size. I had just started when Rachel said from the bed, "Just lay back down here beside me, Mom." I reminded her that we needed to finish the curtains and she reminded me that she cared more about the spending the last few minutes we had together talking and cuddling (yes, even at 22 years old they still like to cuddle).

I constantly need that reminder! You see, I'm a Martha - always doing. My love language is acts of service and that's the way I tend to show my love. (Rachel's is quality time, if you haven't guessed.) It's a family joke that I can't sit down to enjoy a movie- I have to be folding laundry, etc- always doing two things at once.

On my way home, I heard a Focus on the Family interview with Dr. Dan Allender who wrote the book, How Children Raise Parents. He mentioned that God uses our kids to shape us and knock off those rough edges. Sometimes our kids speak to us in such prophetic ways that help us to see things to which we are blind - in my case, being fully present and doing what is really important. There will be always be MORE to do - more dishes to wash, more rooms to clean, more socks to pick up, more projects to complete, more, more, more! But I need to slow down and not do just the urgent that screams to me from the laundry basket, but to do the things that really matter - listening, sharing, cuddling, laughing, reading, making memories.

How about you? Are you fully present with your husband, your kids? Do you take time to enjoy each other? Hopefully, some day my kids will finally get me raised and I will be more of what God has in mind for me.